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注意！千萬別對(duì)孩子說這12句話

出處：網(wǎng)絡(luò)收集日期：2024-11-13 18:35:42編輯：秩名
這12句話千萬別脫口而出，對(duì)孩子說了你會(huì)后悔的
 
　　想起前兩天看到的一個(gè)小視頻，視頻里對(duì)國外的一些小朋友進(jìn)行采訪，問“媽媽平時(shí)說過什么過分的話嗎?”小朋友的回答基本上都是“有”，并且他們復(fù)述的話語中有很高的相似度，要么就是“stupid(愚蠢)”，“shut up(閉嘴)”，要么就是更過分的罵人的話。
 
　　爸爸媽媽們對(duì)孩子的愛總是無微不至的，但有時(shí)候，出于某些原因，比如著急、擔(dān)心、恨鐵不成鋼、生氣等等，可能會(huì)脫口而出一些話語。這些話看似不經(jīng)意，看似不會(huì)對(duì)孩子有影響，但確實(shí)會(huì)深埋ta的心中，對(duì)ta會(huì)造成困擾和傷害。
 
這12句話千萬別脫口而出，對(duì)孩子說了你會(huì)后悔的
 
 
 
　　1、閉嘴!
 
　　孩子到了某個(gè)時(shí)期開始有了自己的想法和思想，當(dāng)他們遇到存在質(zhì)疑的事時(shí)總是會(huì)發(fā)表一下自己的見解，又或者是頂嘴，這個(gè)時(shí)候總是容易讓人火大。
 
　　但是，即使火大也千萬不要說“閉嘴”，這是一句所有人都不喜歡的話語，孩子也同樣如此。如果經(jīng)常脫口而出這句話，結(jié)果可能是他們不再信任你，不再愿意對(duì)你說出更多的話。
 
　　2、有本事你一直哭，看你哭到什么時(shí)候！
 
　　孩子如果一直哭鬧，的確會(huì)讓父母感到心煩，最多放任ta哭鬧幾分鐘，但是即使這樣也不要說出以上這句話。這句話容易讓他們產(chǎn)生無助和恐懼感，甚至哭到最后可能已經(jīng)忘記了當(dāng)初哭的原因，但依舊傷心。
 
　　當(dāng)ta一直哭時(shí)，最好的辦法是告訴ta，媽媽知道你難過、委屈，接著給ta一個(gè)溫暖的擁抱，最后再給ta講講道理。陪伴很重要。
 
　　3、為什么你沒有一件事能做好！
 
　　試想一下，如果有人跟你說了這句話，你是什么感受?是不是滿滿的失落、對(duì)自我的否定?孩子也一樣!
 
　　所有事情從接觸到掌握，都是需要時(shí)間的，而你說出了這么一句話，容易讓ta失去嘗試的勇氣，進(jìn)步自然會(huì)變慢。
 
　　4、這有什么好怕的，大膽一點(diǎn)！
 
　　相信我，這一句話真的像是廢話!對(duì)一個(gè)正在害怕的人說出這一句話，絲毫不能讓ta的感受好一些。此外，這句話是在否認(rèn)孩子的感受，相當(dāng)于無視ta的存在(不信的話，回想一下平時(shí)朋友的安慰，很多情況是這樣的)。
 
　　正確的做法應(yīng)該是問一問ta，究竟在害怕什么，然后切實(shí)地解決ta的煩惱。
 
　　5、男子漢大丈夫，至于嗎？
 
　　常常對(duì)孩子說這樣的一句話，容易讓他們壓抑想要表達(dá)的情感，最終成為一個(gè)無法表達(dá)自我的人，這樣的后果可想而知。
 
 
　　6、這不是你該做的事！
 
　　比如，孩子想要幫你洗碗，你來上這么一句，附帶“趕快去練琴”“趕快去做作業(yè)”，這該多打擊他們的熱情?
 
　　另外，還有的父母會(huì)強(qiáng)調(diào)“這哪是男孩/女孩應(yīng)該做的事?”在孩子探索感興趣的事情階段，就這么給ta澆上一盆冷水，真的好嗎?難道男孩兒不能成為舞蹈家?女孩兒不能成為運(yùn)動(dòng)員？
 
　　7、為什么你就不能像你哥哥/姐姐一樣？
 
　　以前，我們無論是生活還是學(xué)習(xí)都會(huì)遇到一個(gè)“怪獸”，那就是別人家的孩子?？涩F(xiàn)在，別人家的孩子對(duì)比得少了，有的父母開始將自己的兩個(gè)孩子來做對(duì)比了。這樣會(huì)在無形中造成兄弟姐妹間的隔閡。
 
　　又或者，有的孩子比較不愛說話，而哥哥姐姐性格則比較外向，父母可能會(huì)說“你的性格比較內(nèi)向，你姐姐就比較外向”。想過嗎，這樣的話，孩子可能會(huì)在內(nèi)向或者外向的道路上一直走到底，認(rèn)定了自己的這個(gè)樣子！(這就是貼標(biāo)簽吧!)
 
　　8、不聽話的后果就是這樣！
 
　　當(dāng)你告誡孩子不要做某件事，會(huì)有什么后果，最后ta還是做了，此時(shí)你可能會(huì)脫口而出這句話。比如當(dāng)你告誡ta，不要跑，會(huì)跌倒，結(jié)果ta還是跌倒了。如果以后你一直這么強(qiáng)調(diào)，ta也許會(huì)失去許多體驗(yàn)成長的機(jī)會(huì)。
 
　　9、還是XX時(shí)候的你更好
 
　　也許你覺得小時(shí)候的孩子更可愛、更聽話，也許你覺得寶寶現(xiàn)在長大的了太調(diào)皮了，但是也別總是用這句話來表達(dá)你的想法。要知道，孩子是在成長發(fā)育中，ta不可能一直停留在小時(shí)候。
 
　　也許你覺得這句話沒什么，但它真的會(huì)影響孩子的自信心，讓ta認(rèn)為自己現(xiàn)在不夠好。
 
　　10、你別弄，你弄不好，我?guī)湍闩?/div>
 
　　這句話很常聽也很常說，比如，孩子在綁鞋帶、在剝雞蛋、在做一些手工等等，你在一旁看得焦急也許會(huì)脫口而出這句話。
 
　　其實(shí)，孩子有很強(qiáng)的學(xué)習(xí)能力，只要交給他們，他們都能學(xué)會(huì)，而如果你一直幫他們做，那么這句話相信你還會(huì)要說無數(shù)次！
 
　　11、我數(shù)學(xué)也不好，這孩子隨我
 
　　我數(shù)學(xué)不好、我運(yùn)動(dòng)不好、我手腳不太協(xié)調(diào)，這僅僅是家長自己的問題啊，關(guān)孩子什么事呢?如果你總在ta面前說這句話，那么ta以后會(huì)理所當(dāng)然認(rèn)為，數(shù)學(xué)、體育等不好是爸爸媽媽的問題。
 
　　12、這么做，你是壞孩子，媽媽不喜歡！
 
　　你能想象得到，孩子聽到“怎么這么做，你是壞孩子，媽媽不喜歡你了”時(shí)內(nèi)心的失落嗎?有時(shí)候孩子做錯(cuò)某件事肯定是有原因的。
 
　　作為家長的我們首先要做的是找到原因，然后再告訴ta這種行為是不好的，但并不是人是壞的啊。要知道你說的這句話相當(dāng)于告訴孩子，爸爸媽媽無法接受ta了，因?yàn)閠a做了壞事，是個(gè)壞孩子了??！(聽起來是不是感覺邏輯有問題?所以下次別再說這句話了)

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