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尊重BB天性 別總讓他分享

出處：網(wǎng)絡(luò)收集日期：2024-12-25 00:27:49編輯：秩名
尊重BB天性 別總讓他分享
　　如今的孩子總被人詬病，說是過分自我。普遍理由為他們當(dāng)中十之八九是獨(dú)生子女，是家庭中許多成人關(guān)懷、照顧的唯一對(duì)象，從而養(yǎng)成了他們樂于接受別人的東西，卻不愿意將自己的分享給別人的習(xí)慣。無論在哪個(gè)時(shí)代，這話題還是經(jīng)久不衰。
 
　　孩子不是復(fù)制品，每個(gè)孩子都有自己的想法及做法，尊重他們的天性，千萬不要扭曲了他們的分享行為，強(qiáng)迫他們做出分享。
 
寶貝為何不愛分享
　　當(dāng)孩子兩歲左右，就會(huì)開始有自主權(quán)、所有權(quán)的概念，這對(duì)孩子來說是一個(gè)非常重要的概念。這時(shí)候，他需要確定與非?？隙?ldquo;這個(gè)東西屬于我”的基礎(chǔ)上，才會(huì)做出分享的這個(gè)舉動(dòng)。缺乏了這個(gè)肯定，他會(huì)擔(dān)心別人拿走他的東西，就沒辦法做出分享了。這時(shí)，媽媽就需要給與他肯定，告訴他：“這是你的，但你可以分享。”他會(huì)實(shí)驗(yàn)，但當(dāng)他選擇不分享的時(shí)候，允許他不要強(qiáng)迫他，告訴他：“那當(dāng)你覺得可以分享的時(shí)候，再分享也可以的。”就好了。
 
　　不愛分享，與人品無關(guān)。一般越有安全感的孩子越容易分享，當(dāng)然也有另一部分的原因可能是和天性中占有欲比較強(qiáng)，需要得到的肯定比較多有關(guān)，但這些都沒關(guān)系的，只要給孩子一些時(shí)間，隨著他慢慢長大，慢慢有自信，他會(huì)有愿意分享的一天的。
 
　　父母越是勉強(qiáng)，孩子越不愿意分享。當(dāng)他這一次拒絕把自己的東西分享給別人，下一次他或許就會(huì)把心思放在“怎么保護(hù)自己的東西”上，像會(huì)把東西藏起來等行為出現(xiàn)。所以，當(dāng)孩子準(zhǔn)備好時(shí)，再讓他做出分享吧。
 
 
切記，不要強(qiáng)迫孩子分享
 
 
　　用謙讓的理由來灌輸子分享，會(huì)讓孩子積壓不滿情緒。爸媽教育孩子要謙讓并沒有錯(cuò)，但爸媽們可以留意一下，你們的孩子把東西分享給別人后，他是否開心，有沒有找借口發(fā)脾氣?如果有，那就證明她并不情愿給別人東西。如果這情況發(fā)生了，爸媽們可以告訴小朋友：東西是屬于你，只有當(dāng)你覺得快樂或無所謂的時(shí)候，你才分享，千萬不要勉強(qiáng)自己。更孩子強(qiáng)調(diào)了所有權(quán)，他才能學(xué)會(huì)保護(hù)自己，不會(huì)別人讓他做什么，他都說好。
 
　　不允許他說不，會(huì)導(dǎo)致退縮行為。特意教導(dǎo)孩子必須分享，不允許他說不的話，那誰開口都能要走他的東西。孩子這樣只會(huì)學(xué)會(huì)討好別人而已，更可悲的是，或許別人都只是想想，還沒開口，他就已經(jīng)為了迎合別人而把東西給了別人。這樣久而久之，他心里積累了許多壓力不說，長大后也會(huì)變得極容易受人影響。所以，允許他說不，教導(dǎo)他遵從內(nèi)心想法，不喜歡千萬不要勉強(qiáng)自己。
 
　　孩子太會(huì)分享也非好事，父母太縱容，會(huì)讓孩子覺得這東西得到很容易而隨意過度分享。孩子有時(shí)候會(huì)為了讓別人高興、喜歡他而什么都分享給別人，但這行為是非常不適當(dāng)?shù)摹０謰寕円虝?huì)他，照顧別人的同時(shí)也要照顧自己。比如一件玩具，要是他不想再玩，覺得別人很喜歡，那么送給對(duì)方也沒關(guān)系，但要是自己還是很喜歡的，就不必這樣了。還可以讓他知道，東西只能要一個(gè)，要是你送給了別人，爸媽就沒錢給力多買一個(gè)的了喲。這樣的習(xí)慣與關(guān)聯(lián)，要從小就會(huì)他們，讓他們學(xué)會(huì)愛惜自己的東西。
 
 
關(guān)于分享，你可以這樣引導(dǎo)
 
 
　　先愛自己，再愛別人
 
　　先學(xué)會(huì)照顧自己，孩子才有能力照顧別人，才能進(jìn)一步作出分享。爸媽們可以讓他知道，愿意分享是好的，但更要教會(huì)孩子秉持這些原則：
 
　　1.如果有些東西，你有很多或者已經(jīng)不再需要，當(dāng)別人需要時(shí)，你可以分享。
 
　　2.如果你很喜歡，不愿意分享也可以。
 
　　爸媽以身作則
 
　　爸媽永遠(yuǎn)是最好的示范，孩子有時(shí)候并不會(huì)做父母講的，但會(huì)學(xué)做父母做的。如果教導(dǎo)孩子的道理只進(jìn)入孩子的頭腦里，到不了心里的話，是成為不了他潛移默化的一種行為。只有當(dāng)他把事情記在了心上，當(dāng)將來遇到同類事情時(shí)，他就會(huì)自然而然地照做了。就像每天勤奮工作的爸媽，無需教導(dǎo)孩子勤勞，這是孩子每天都會(huì)看到的事情自然也會(huì)耳濡目染地對(duì)他產(chǎn)生影響。分享也同理，可以為孩子做出“分享示范”。比如，吃蛋糕的時(shí)候，問問孩子“你要吃一塊嗎?”或者父母做其他事情時(shí)候，也應(yīng)該注意讓孩子觀察到爸媽們是在做出“分享”。這種方式我們比較提倡，因?yàn)楹⒆咏邮芷饋碜顭o防備，最自然而然。
 
　　角色互換
 
　　如果孩子常常不愛分享，那么不妨考慮與孩子互換角色。創(chuàng)造機(jī)會(huì)跟孩子一起玩，當(dāng)孩他想要你手中玩具的時(shí)候，你就說“不，我不給”。當(dāng)這小家伙覺得心煩的時(shí)候，你就可以曉之以理，讓他明白“學(xué)會(huì)分享，大家才能開心地一起玩”這道理。

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