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如何理解孩子說謊，在什么情況下會(huì)說謊(2)

出處：媽媽育兒網(wǎng)日期：2016-04-01 13:09:52編輯：xixi

2、及時(shí)表揚(yáng)獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)誠實(shí)的孩子

要培養(yǎng)一個(gè)好的行為習(xí)慣，獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)比懲罰更重要。當(dāng)孩子如實(shí)告訴家長自己犯的錯(cuò)誤，家長往往忽視了孩子誠實(shí)的表現(xiàn)，只是一味斥責(zé)孩子的錯(cuò)誤行為，孩子的誠實(shí)行為沒有得到及時(shí)的鼓勵(lì)強(qiáng)化。

家長發(fā)現(xiàn)孩子闖了禍之后，不要?dú)饧睌牡刎?zé)問：“這是不是你干的？”因?yàn)楹⒆雍芸赡芘录议L生氣而說“不是”。這樣的問話方式實(shí)際上是誘導(dǎo)孩子說謊。

家長可以注視著孩子的眼睛，等孩子自己說出真相，或者說：“發(fā)生了什么事？”如果孩子承認(rèn)了錯(cuò)誤或請(qǐng)求原諒，應(yīng)立即告訴孩子：能承認(rèn)錯(cuò)誤很不簡單，然后再對(duì)孩子做的錯(cuò)事進(jìn)行批評(píng)。由于孩子的誠實(shí)行為，相應(yīng)地要減輕對(duì)他的批評(píng)或處罰。

3、制定一些規(guī)則并嚴(yán)格要求

要防止孩子說謊，教育孩子誠實(shí)，光講道理不行，要有行為規(guī)范的具體要求，讓孩子從小就按誠實(shí)的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)來嚴(yán)格要求自己，自覺養(yǎng)成良好的習(xí)慣。

，父母要針對(duì)孩子的實(shí)際情況，提出“幾要幾不要”的具體要求，如：不講假話，不編瞎話，不說大話，不謊報(bào)成績等等。

不是自己的東西不能帶回家，沒有得到別人的同意，不可隨便拿別人的東西，借了人家的東西要及時(shí)歸還，有了錯(cuò)要勇于承認(rèn)，凡是答應(yīng)別人的請(qǐng)求就一定要想方設(shè)法去做好等。這些規(guī)則一經(jīng)提出就要嚴(yán)格執(zhí)行，不能朝令夕改，并要重視克服“第一次”出現(xiàn)的問題。對(duì)執(zhí)行規(guī)則，家長要態(tài)度堅(jiān)決，嚴(yán)格要求，切不可遷就、姑息。

4、重視孩子的第一次說謊

當(dāng)孩子第一次說謊時(shí)，家長應(yīng)將其當(dāng)做一件大事來抓，決不能掉以輕心。要知道有第一次，就會(huì)有第二次，第三次。

一般孩子在第一次說謊時(shí)會(huì)感到不安，即使蒙混過關(guān)了也會(huì)十分擔(dān)心，但是如果這第一次說謊沒有得到及時(shí)的糾正，孩子便可以品味到說謊所帶來的甜蜜。

他也就會(huì)由此產(chǎn)生再次嘗試說謊的欲望，孩子會(huì)覺得家長是“好騙的”、“可欺的”，他的膽子會(huì)越來越大，謊話會(huì)越說越多，越編越像，最終就撒謊成性了。

5、適當(dāng)懲戒

有些父母則采取懲戒的方法糾正孩子的說謊。這種為“戒”而“罰”，也是愛的基本方式之一，然而這又是一種最令人棘手和帶有風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的愛，因?yàn)楹⒆尤菀椎钟|施加懲戒的人。但是，如果你的懲戒出于愛心，又執(zhí)行得合理、巧妙，事后講清道理，孩子會(huì)受益很大，并心悅誠服。

在認(rèn)真耐心的教育之后，孩子出現(xiàn)說謊等兩面行為，可以采取一定的懲罰措施。著名作家冰心曾讓用肥皂洗嘴的辦法懲罰孩子說謊。

我們可以創(chuàng)造一些有效的措施，如朗誦一個(gè)講誠實(shí)的故事，抄寫一段論誠實(shí)的名人名言，寫一篇討論誠實(shí)問題的日記或文章，取消一次外出游玩的安排等……

對(duì)孩子的這類“小聰明”，父母既不能嚴(yán)肅批評(píng)，把它列入說謊的范圍，因?yàn)檫@在成人世界里，也不屬于違犯道德的行為。但是，這類行為又不能成為孩子的習(xí)慣。當(dāng)孩子經(jīng)常尋找借口推辭他應(yīng)做的正事和他應(yīng)該承擔(dān)的義務(wù)時(shí)，家長就要嚴(yán)肅對(duì)待了。以身作則：父母是孩子模仿最多的人，你能夠?yàn)楹⒆訕淞⒄\實(shí)的榜樣是非常重要的。

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