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姑姑坐壞了寶貝的生日蛋糕，怎么辦？不同家庭教育養(yǎng)育不同孩子

出處：@沫沫的歲月靜好日期：2024-06-12 11:17:03編輯：小編

前幾天看到一個(gè)視頻。

廣西的一個(gè)小女孩過(guò)生日，全家人聚在一起其樂(lè)融融。生日PARTY中最為精彩、也是孩子最為盼望的一幕終于出現(xiàn)，精美的生日蛋糕終于被“請(qǐng)”了出來(lái)。

可是蛋糕當(dāng)時(shí)沒(méi)有放到桌子上，而是放到了一把椅子上。就在瞬間，本來(lái)站起來(lái)拍照的孩子姑姑沒(méi)有回頭，忽然不偏不倚地坐回了椅子上。

就這樣，一個(gè)生日蛋糕被姑姑不留神的坐壞了。

從視頻中可以看出，過(guò)生日的孩子在看到蛋糕被損壞的瞬間絕望地嚎啕大哭，而孩子的姑姑顧不上自己裙子上沾滿(mǎn)了蛋糕，立即安撫孩子。

可惜，孩子被情緒所控制，哭聲越來(lái)越大。

這時(shí)全家人都圍了過(guò)來(lái)，不是幫助姑姑擦衣服，也不是協(xié)助姑姑安撫孩子，而是紛紛譴責(zé)姑姑的不小心、破壞氣氛等等……

不知道視頻中的姑姑當(dāng)時(shí)是否很悲哀，反正我看著是覺(jué)得有些“窒息”的。這樣的家庭氛圍，注定了孩子的大哭大鬧，也注定了本來(lái)歡樂(lè)的家庭聚會(huì)不歡而散。

孩子想吃蛋糕、盼望蛋糕的心情可以理解，哪個(gè)小孩子不是如此呢？看到自己心心念念的東西被破壞，孩子心中的難過(guò)、痛苦也可以理解；只不過(guò)，事實(shí)就是如此，蛋糕已經(jīng)坐壞了，難道哭鬧和責(zé)罵就能夠挽回一切嗎？很顯然，不是如此。

那么，作為成年人，作為家庭成員，大家立即分工協(xié)助，想辦法彌補(bǔ)一下孩子。你來(lái)安撫孩子，我來(lái)重新定一個(gè)蛋糕，或者先給孩子買(mǎi)一個(gè)小蛋糕、小玩具都可以……孩子在這樣的氛圍下就得到很好的安撫，而姑姑，也能夠在這樣的氛圍中，感受到濃濃的親情。

行動(dòng)勝過(guò)一切譴責(zé)，而家庭的團(tuán)結(jié)和諧，更是最為難得可貴的，也是給孩子留下深刻印象，并會(huì)潛移默化的給孩子上一節(jié)珍貴的“如何處理突發(fā)事件、如何珍惜家庭關(guān)系”的實(shí)情實(shí)景課。

當(dāng)孩子再次遇到類(lèi)似的情景時(shí)，不是哭鬧、不是絕望、不是哀嘆，更不是推卸責(zé)任和譴責(zé)別人，而是會(huì)積極主動(dòng)地想辦法，努力的調(diào)整氣氛，“賓主盡歡”才是聚會(huì)的精髓吧！

我們常常說(shuō)“家風(fēng)、家訓(xùn)、家規(guī)”，其實(shí)不是家庭中老祖宗留下來(lái)的各種條文規(guī)定，而是在家庭成員之間，相互尊重、相互理解、共同遵守和有效延續(xù)的一種行為規(guī)范。

我記得我家大寶小時(shí)候，我?guī)鋈ネ?，他不留神把我給他帶的水果杯碰掉了，水果撒了一地。當(dāng)時(shí)和他一起玩的那個(gè)孩子幸災(zāi)樂(lè)禍地看著他說(shuō)：“你完蛋了，你媽媽該吵你了。”

大寶卻搖搖頭：“我媽媽不會(huì)吵我的，不過(guò)我要先把地面弄干凈。”

那個(gè)孩子吃驚地看著大寶：“真的？這都不吵你？”

正好我走過(guò)去，遞給大寶幾片濕巾，讓他墊著把地上的水果清理干凈，我拿著水果杯去清洗。等我回來(lái)，那個(gè)孩子看著我說(shuō)：“阿姨，你真好。”

我有些驚訝，難道孩子不留神碰掉了杯子，不是整理干凈，而是要挨吵的嗎？

那個(gè)孩子的媽媽卻對(duì)我說(shuō)：“孩子錯(cuò)了，就要吵他、懲罰他，他們才會(huì)長(zhǎng)記性，也不敢再犯錯(cuò)。你這樣太溫柔，他們下次還犯錯(cuò)。”

在我看來(lái)，讓孩子自己動(dòng)手整理地面，不就是對(duì)他的懲罰嗎？而媽媽的溫柔，才是孩子勇敢前行的底氣??！

后來(lái)因?yàn)榻逃^(guān)點(diǎn)的不一樣，我們之間的關(guān)系也漸行漸遠(yuǎn)。

我不知道她家孩子現(xiàn)在如何，只能說(shuō)我家大寶現(xiàn)在8年級(jí)，我過(guò)去曾經(jīng)擔(dān)心的青春期的叛逆還未曾發(fā)生，他也愿意和我分享自己的一切成長(zhǎng)悲喜和學(xué)習(xí)經(jīng)歷，沒(méi)有因?yàn)橐淮慰疾缓枚话?，也沒(méi)有因?yàn)橐淮纬煽?jī)優(yōu)異而驕傲自滿(mǎn)；接人待物也比較溫和、有禮貌；性格上不極端，思想上也不偏激，能夠正確地看待自己的優(yōu)缺點(diǎn)，并在成長(zhǎng)的路上繼續(xù)自我努力著；目前看來(lái)，他還是那棵正在茁壯成長(zhǎng)且沒(méi)有長(zhǎng)歪的小樹(shù)。

其實(shí)養(yǎng)育孩子對(duì)于所有的父母來(lái)講，都是一種摸索，只不過(guò)需要謹(jǐn)慎，因?yàn)楹⒆拥某砷L(zhǎng)不可重來(lái)、不會(huì)逆轉(zhuǎn)。

而我們能夠帶給孩子的，絕不是空泛乏味的大道理，往往隨著孩子越長(zhǎng)越大，他們的道理會(huì)比家長(zhǎng)更多；也不是喋喋不休地嘮叨，因?yàn)楫?dāng)一件事情發(fā)生，孩子對(duì)父母的言行舉止往往會(huì)有一個(gè)預(yù)判，而他們的預(yù)判往往是很精準(zhǔn)的，這種準(zhǔn)確度，既來(lái)源于父母的嘮叨，也是對(duì)父母嘮叨的一種有力反抗。

父母能夠帶給孩子的，應(yīng)該是一個(gè)幸福的家庭氛圍，家庭成員間相互包容、理解、扶持。

要知道，父母的所作所為，點(diǎn)點(diǎn)滴滴，都將會(huì)成為若干年后，孩子口中的“原生家庭”哦！而原生家庭對(duì)孩子所造成的影響，是終生如影隨形的。

溫馨的原生家庭，才會(huì)為孩子的一生幸福而助力！

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