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孩子愛(ài)頂嘴怎么辦？“閉嘴”才是父母最好的選擇，現(xiàn)在知道還不晚

出處：@妖精媽媽育兒經(jīng)日期：2024-08-11 11:45:30編輯：網(wǎng)絡(luò)收集

“我不去幼兒園”

“我不吃米飯”

“我才不穿這件衣服”

孩子從會(huì)說(shuō)話(huà)開(kāi)始，說(shuō)得最多的就是“不”字。很多家長(zhǎng)常常疑惑，為什么這么小的孩子就學(xué)會(huì)了頂嘴？

其實(shí)，孩子頂嘴并不意味著和你唱對(duì)臺(tái)戲，只是他們的答案讓你出乎意料罷了。很多父母都希望孩子能乖乖地，讓干什么就干什么，做一個(gè)有耳無(wú)嘴的小孩就很好。

如果這樣，我們?yōu)槭裁催€要教孩子說(shuō)話(huà)呢？我們教孩子說(shuō)話(huà)，就是要讓他們可以準(zhǔn)確表達(dá)自己的情感。孩子小的時(shí)候，掌握的詞語(yǔ)很少，所以他們愛(ài)說(shuō)“不”。隨著孩子的成長(zhǎng)，對(duì)自己情緒表達(dá)越清晰，父母的教養(yǎng)就會(huì)越簡(jiǎn)單。

剛開(kāi)始做媽媽的時(shí)候，我把所有的精力和時(shí)間都放在了墨墨身上，她問(wèn)我的所有問(wèn)題，我都認(rèn)真回答，不留遺漏。結(jié)果就是，墨墨學(xué)說(shuō)話(huà)的速度很快，也很愛(ài)說(shuō)話(huà)，更愛(ài)不停地發(fā)問(wèn)。

在她3歲的時(shí)候，墨墨問(wèn)我：“墨墨，做錯(cuò)事會(huì)被懲罰嗎？”

我說(shuō)：“是啊，每個(gè)人都要為自己的行為負(fù)責(zé)啊。”

墨墨說(shuō)：“要是我做錯(cuò)事了，罵罵就行了，不要打我。太疼了。”

從那之后，我再也沒(méi)有打罵過(guò)她，因?yàn)槲抑浪呀?jīng)學(xué)會(huì)如何表達(dá)自己的想法了，我們可以用更和平的方式解決問(wèn)題——溝通。

當(dāng)父母的都知道，教育孩子可以不簡(jiǎn)單，如果僅憑溝通就能解決問(wèn)題，也就不會(huì)有什么“父母焦慮癥候群”了。

隨著孩子的長(zhǎng)大，就開(kāi)始有各種小主意兒，開(kāi)始在吃穿住行等生活的各方面向你發(fā)出抗議和挑戰(zhàn)。這時(shí)候，父母能做的無(wú)非兩種，一是聽(tīng)孩子，二是斗個(gè)你死我活。

孩子頂嘴的時(shí)候，父母慣用的做法就是用居高臨下的方式強(qiáng)迫孩子接受自己的決定。我想問(wèn)父母一個(gè)問(wèn)題，如果對(duì)面站的是你的老板，你還敢這樣做嗎？顯然不敢。

傾聽(tīng)，對(duì)于一個(gè)父母是多么重要；懂得傾聽(tīng)的父母對(duì)于一個(gè)孩子是多么地重要。當(dāng)親子之間產(chǎn)生矛盾的時(shí)候，父母不妨先聽(tīng)聽(tīng)孩子的想法，給他們一個(gè)表達(dá)自己真實(shí)想法的機(jī)會(huì)。然后，父母和孩子一起分析和誘導(dǎo)孩子，作出正確的選擇。

有一次，墨墨生病了，我準(zhǔn)備陪她看醫(yī)生。她給我提要求說(shuō)：“看醫(yī)生可以，能不能不吃藥？”

我想了想說(shuō)：“這個(gè)媽媽說(shuō)了不算，治病我們得聽(tīng)醫(yī)生的。”

結(jié)果醫(yī)生說(shuō)：“墨墨，有兩個(gè)選擇，一個(gè)是輸液，一個(gè)是吃藥，你選哪個(gè)啊？”

最后她選擇了吃藥！在這次就醫(yī)過(guò)程中，女兒清晰地表達(dá)了自己的想法和訴求，更知道了自己是身體的主人，要好好照顧自己。

還有一次，墨墨讓我買(mǎi)一個(gè)她非常喜歡的玩具。因?yàn)榉浅Ｏ矚g，她天天問(wèn)我快遞到哪了呢。因?yàn)槭请p十一，晚上8點(diǎn)的時(shí)候快遞小哥才打電話(huà)說(shuō)快遞放到小區(qū)超市了。

吃完晚飯都十點(diǎn)了，我讓墨墨打電話(huà)確認(rèn)一下超市是否開(kāi)門(mén)。她來(lái)一句：“超市開(kāi)門(mén)到11點(diǎn)，肯定沒(méi)關(guān)門(mén)！”

結(jié)果，當(dāng)我們走到超市門(mén)口的時(shí)候，發(fā)現(xiàn)里面黑著燈。我本來(lái)還想責(zé)備和嘲笑她幾句，可還沒(méi)等我開(kāi)口，她卻說(shuō)：：“是我不對(duì)，下次我一定提前打個(gè)電話(huà)。”看到了嗎？有些事大人說(shuō)上百次，不如孩子親身經(jīng)歷一次。

當(dāng)孩子開(kāi)始給你頂嘴、犯錯(cuò)的時(shí)候，說(shuō)明孩子已經(jīng)長(zhǎng)大了，開(kāi)始有了自己的想法，父母不應(yīng)反對(duì)和強(qiáng)迫，而是耐心地去引導(dǎo)他們，鼓勵(lì)他們表達(dá)自己的情緒。

當(dāng)孩子頂嘴的時(shí)候，父母學(xué)會(huì)閉嘴，聽(tīng)聽(tīng)孩子的想法才是正確的選擇。孩子可以輕松地表達(dá)自己的意見(jiàn)和想法，不僅有利于孩子自信心的建立，還可以減少親子沖突。

作為父母，我們不可能陪伴孩子一生，他們需要自己具備適應(yīng)社會(huì)和解決問(wèn)題的能力。因此，具備清晰表達(dá)自己想法的能力對(duì)于孩子是非常重要的。

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