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賈環(huán)，躲在媽媽背后的齷齪小少爺，給無(wú)數(shù)愛(ài)子心切的母親以警示

出處：@沫沫的歲月靜好日期：2024-06-13 20:55:44編輯：小編

《紅樓夢(mèng)》中，若是賈寶玉算是豐神如玉的話，他同父異母的弟弟賈環(huán)，則真的可以用賊眉鼠目來(lái)形容了。

我想，若是排行《紅樓夢(mèng)》里最不受歡迎的人物榜，賈環(huán)和趙姨娘母子一定會(huì)“光榮”上榜吧！曹公對(duì)自己筆下的人物可謂各個(gè)珍惜，即便是不受歡迎，也依舊栩栩如生，仿佛從書中走出來(lái)，站在我們眼前、身邊一樣。

趙姨娘的悲劇，無(wú)法逃脫封建社會(huì)一夫多妻以及夫權(quán)至上的規(guī)則。在那個(gè)時(shí)代，本身是丫鬟出身，成為權(quán)貴之家的姨娘，也算是讓自己的階層有了一個(gè)飛躍。

當(dāng)然也是因人而異的，比如鴛鴦，就毅然決然抗婚，寧死不屈；也有平兒，不得已作為陪嫁丫鬟成為通房大丫頭；還有襲人，心心念念地喜歡自己的少爺從而心甘情愿成為姨娘……

至于趙姨娘來(lái)講，可能更多的是虛榮心在作祟吧！

不過(guò)，自從她“母憑子貴”，為賈政生下一兒一女，尤其是生下賈環(huán)之后，整個(gè)人更是飄飄然不知身居何處，甚至一度心生歹念，想要自家賈環(huán)取而代之賈寶玉……

所以本身鼠目寸光、見(jiàn)識(shí)狹窄、毫無(wú)胸襟的她，親自養(yǎng)大的賈環(huán)，言傳身教下也就難逃“人人討厭”的命運(yùn)。

賈環(huán)的悲劇在于他本身毫無(wú)亮點(diǎn)。

偏偏前面有帶著祥瑞出生又溫潤(rùn)如玉、深得老祖母寵愛(ài)、還是正房夫人所生的兄長(zhǎng)賈寶玉；

后面有心胸狹窄、目光短淺，偏又望子成龍，還非想要依靠邪門歪路取勝的母親；

旁邊還有只愿和賈寶玉交往，對(duì)自己屢屢嗤之以鼻的丫鬟；

在這三者的對(duì)比夾擊下，賈環(huán)心中何來(lái)“坦蕩蕩”可言？

而其中，對(duì)賈環(huán)影響最大的，莫過(guò)于他的母親趙姨娘了。

趙姨娘本是“弱勢(shì)群體”，在人人都是“一顆富貴心，兩個(gè)勢(shì)利眼”的賈府，她的姨娘身份，導(dǎo)致她人微言輕，就是自己的親生女兒，也常常把她懟到千里之外的模樣。

如果她保持了自己的身份，或者安于現(xiàn)狀，就像紅樓夢(mèng)中與她同樣身份的“周姨娘”一般，倒也沒(méi)有太多的問(wèn)題，何況她還有賈府的公子哥兒傍身，處境怎樣都不會(huì)太壞。

偏偏她不愿意“安分守己”，處處都想要爭(zhēng)一爭(zhēng)，時(shí)時(shí)哀怨命運(yùn)的不公，也就只能嘆一聲她的愚蠢了。

趙姨娘想要把自己的兒子扶上位，賈環(huán)想要害死自己的親哥哥，這對(duì)母子的不約而同又異曲同工，還真是親生母子??！

只不過(guò)，除了賈環(huán)在極度嫉妒之下，推倒燈油燒了賈寶玉之外，其他地方，都可以看出他不過(guò)是躲在母親身后的可憐蟲(chóng)罷了。而趙姨娘，卻不過(guò)是色厲內(nèi)荏、強(qiáng)壯聲勢(shì)而已。

1、趙姨娘對(duì)賈環(huán)有太多的怒其不爭(zhēng)

《紅樓夢(mèng)》中有一回，賈環(huán)和丫鬟玩輸了錢卻不愿意給，被丫鬟恥笑后回到家里，被趙姨娘扯著嗓子罵，后來(lái)被王熙鳳聽(tīng)到，叫走了賈環(huán)，譴責(zé)了趙姨娘。

事實(shí)上，作為少爺和丫鬟賭錢本就不該，若是再贏了丫鬟的錢，就更顯小氣。趙姨娘若真的為賈環(huán)考慮，或者真的是“拎得清、看得明”的母親，就應(yīng)該好好教導(dǎo)賈環(huán)男子漢大丈夫的氣概和氣勢(shì)，而不是對(duì)任何人都斤斤計(jì)較的小家子氣。

王熙鳳當(dāng)時(shí)就給賈環(huán)一吊錢，讓他好好和丫頭們?nèi)ネ?，不必委屈自己，也不必?fù)杆粞绢^的錢。這才是為人主人應(yīng)有的氣勢(shì)啊。

所以趙姨娘的強(qiáng)勢(shì)，并不是真的強(qiáng)勢(shì)，而是把子女變成自我實(shí)現(xiàn)的途徑，把自己的價(jià)值強(qiáng)行依附在子女身上。也難怪賈環(huán)并不快樂(lè)，而賈探春干脆就不認(rèn)她這個(gè)娘了。

2、趙姨娘對(duì)賈環(huán)過(guò)分苛責(zé)卻事與愿違

《紅樓夢(mèng)》中另有一回，賈環(huán)問(wèn)怡紅院的丫頭要薔薇硝，芳官卻給了他茉莉粉。后來(lái)賈環(huán)拿到自己家里給關(guān)系好的丫頭炫，結(jié)果被發(fā)現(xiàn)，賈環(huán)本來(lái)也不太介意這種女孩子用的東西究竟是什么，反正香香的可以使用就好，偏偏趙姨娘卻無(wú)法咽下這口氣，覺(jué)得自家孩子被人戲耍捉弄，恨鐵不成鋼的罵過(guò)賈環(huán)，又怒氣沖沖的跑到怡紅院大鬧了一場(chǎng)。

這一鬧，只不過(guò)讓自己傷痕累累，又丟了主人的面子，也沒(méi)有在兒子面前樹(shù)立威風(fēng)。

趙姨娘這樣做的最大錯(cuò)誤在于，她對(duì)于賈環(huán)的未來(lái)還懷有太多不切實(shí)際的幻想，而且她自以為是地認(rèn)為只要自己抖抖威風(fēng)，就可以成為真正的主人，實(shí)際上不過(guò)是在慢慢毀掉賈環(huán)本就寥寥無(wú)幾的自信心，又同時(shí)增加了賈環(huán)的頹廢與變壞的速度。

父母對(duì)孩子過(guò)分的渴求，會(huì)使孩子失去安全感，心理壓力增大，常懷有恐慌之感，底氣皆無(wú)，碌碌無(wú)為。

現(xiàn)在生活中，雖然早就沒(méi)有了一夫多妻的荼毒，但是很多父親會(huì)在育兒中抽身遠(yuǎn)離，把養(yǎng)育孩子的事情交給媽媽，也是我們現(xiàn)在所說(shuō)的“喪偶式育兒”的詮釋。

其實(shí)這樣對(duì)于媽媽來(lái)講，也是很不公平的事情，對(duì)家庭育兒來(lái)講，也是不可取的。因?yàn)榘职值倪h(yuǎn)離，會(huì)導(dǎo)致媽媽太多的勞心勞力，漸漸地心態(tài)失衡，也并非絕無(wú)僅有。

正如趙姨娘虛張聲勢(shì)的“強(qiáng)勢(shì)”，更多是因?yàn)樽约壕裆畹目仗摱褍鹤赢?dāng)做自己未來(lái)的盼望，作為自己情感的依托，其實(shí)也著實(shí)可悲可憐。

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