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36計(jì)幫你教育出樂觀自信、勇于擔(dān)當(dāng)責(zé)任的孩子

出處：媽媽育兒網(wǎng)日期：2012-09-19 11:42:39編輯：Chen

對于孩子的教育問題，很多家長都頗有同感，那就是一個字“累”。其實(shí)孩子真的有那么難教育嗎，為什么我們中國的家長覺得教育孩子是一件很艱難的事呢？

其實(shí)沒有教不好的孩子，只有不會教的父母。不同的教育方法可以塑造不同的品性，培養(yǎng)不同的特質(zhì)。美國“MSN健康網(wǎng)”日前給廣大家長推薦了36個計(jì)策，幫父母培養(yǎng)樂觀自信、勇于擔(dān)當(dāng)?shù)暮煤⒆印?/p>

美國育兒專家：教你36計(jì)帶出好孩子

1.樣板計(jì)：樹立學(xué)習(xí)榜樣。北京大學(xué)臨床心理中心辦公室主任、親子問題專家林紅強(qiáng)調(diào)，孩子是父母的鏡子，在孩子面前，再細(xì)微的言行舉止也要留意，樹立好榜樣。

2.鼓勵計(jì)：鼓勵他挑戰(zhàn)困難。孩子很容易因?yàn)橐恍┐煺鄯艞壟Γ藭r，家長的鼓勵是他們前進(jìn)的勇氣和動力，能幫孩子找到問題、改正缺點(diǎn)，不斷進(jìn)步。

3.傾聽計(jì)：掌握孩子的感受。再小的孩子也會有自己的想法，父母一定要抽出時間，耐心聽他說話，了解他的想法和感受，以便及時對孩子的身心變化、問題等做出處理。

4.賞善計(jì)：獎勵比懲罰有效。賞識教育專家周弘認(rèn)為，教育孩子，獎勵比懲罰有效得多。用獎勵正確來代替懲罰錯誤，既能避免傷害孩子，又可以督促他發(fā)揚(yáng)優(yōu)點(diǎn)。

5.扮弱計(jì)：偶爾向孩子“求助”。缺乏責(zé)任心，常常是因?yàn)楦改刚疹櫶艿健Ｅ紶栂蚝⒆?ldquo;求助”，你會發(fā)現(xiàn)他變成了懂事的“小大人”。

6.補(bǔ)強(qiáng)計(jì)：好習(xí)慣多夸獎。美國加州大學(xué)哲學(xué)家詹姆斯·多伯林提出“補(bǔ)強(qiáng)法則”，也就是說，當(dāng)一個人的正性行為受到認(rèn)可時，就能逐漸擺脫自卑，不斷激發(fā)自信心。

7.冷淡計(jì)：任性時別睬他。任性幾乎是獨(dú)生子女的通病。此時，家長務(wù)必要狠下心“隔離”他，讓他因?yàn)榈貌坏疥P(guān)注，自動收斂壞脾氣。

8.放手計(jì)：讓孩子自己嘗試。包辦父母只能養(yǎng)出飛不出籠子的金絲雀。制造一些讓孩子嘗試、摸索的機(jī)會，他們才能獨(dú)立應(yīng)對生活。

9.縱容計(jì)：別扼殺淘氣天性。“淘氣包”、“搗蛋鬼”往往腦子靈光、求知欲強(qiáng)。在允許的范圍內(nèi)適當(dāng)縱容這些行為，是挖掘孩子潛能和創(chuàng)造力的好時機(jī)。

10.處罰計(jì)：讓孩子懂得承擔(dān)錯誤。做錯事了可以安慰，但一定不能姑息，適度的懲罰才能讓他明白“賞罰分明”這一生存法則。

11.制冷計(jì)：自滿時潑點(diǎn)冷水。一旦發(fā)現(xiàn)孩子有驕傲自滿、目中無人的苗頭，父母應(yīng)該適時給他潑冷水，讓孩子正確、客觀地認(rèn)識自己。

12.點(diǎn)撥計(jì)：用引導(dǎo)代替說教。絮絮叨叨的說教，是孩子最不喜歡的教育方式之一。最好從旁稍加提示引導(dǎo)，這種啟發(fā)會讓孩子充滿感激。

13.感化計(jì)：用真情打動孩子。教育不僅是灌輸、勸導(dǎo)、監(jiān)督，有時還要動之以情。比如給孩子講一個真實(shí)的故事，會給他留下深刻印象。

14.平等計(jì)：別給孩子特權(quán)。要想克服“自我為中心”，首先得從家里開始，不要給孩子特殊的地位或特權(quán)，好東西要全家人分享。

15.受挫計(jì)：適當(dāng)挫折教育。美國教育家卡樂爾·桑德堡曾說，經(jīng)過挫折和千錘百煉成長起來的孩子才更具生存競爭力。為了培養(yǎng)心理韌勁，適當(dāng)?shù)拇煺劢逃夭豢缮佟?/p>

16.包容計(jì)：接受孩子的缺點(diǎn)。你的孩子也許不夠聰明，有很多缺點(diǎn)，但父母不能因此嘲笑或嫌棄他，寬容弱點(diǎn)，才能戰(zhàn)勝自卑，用優(yōu)點(diǎn)掩蓋瑕疵。

17.虛擬計(jì)：時常 夸他“很棒”。日本教育家鈴木鎮(zhèn)一表示，找到了好孩子的感覺，他就會成為好孩子。告訴孩子“你很棒”，這種積極的心理暗示，會讓他產(chǎn)生積極向上的正面自我評價(jià)。

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