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影響孩子一生的36種好習(xí)慣(10)

出處：媽媽育兒網(wǎng)日期：2010-06-26 14:08:57編輯：admin

一般來說，只有從小就享受到“民主”的孩子，才會(huì)感受到人生的快樂。因此，聰明的父母不妨做個(gè)“懶惰”的父母，讓孩子自己去選擇、處理自己的事情。

建議四：允許孩子自由地表現(xiàn)悲傷。

孩子在遇到困境時(shí)，往往會(huì)表現(xiàn)出悲傷。父母應(yīng)該允許孩子自由地表現(xiàn)悲傷。如果孩子在哭泣的時(shí)候，父母要求孩子停止哭泣，不能表現(xiàn)出軟弱，孩子就會(huì)把心中的悲傷積聚起來，久而久之，反而造成孩子的消極心理。

俞梅剛上小學(xué)不久，就發(fā)生了一件讓她傷心的事情。她從小就非常要好的伙伴小艷在班上結(jié)識(shí)了一個(gè)外地轉(zhuǎn)學(xué)來的同學(xué)，從此，小艷與新同學(xué)的關(guān)系非常好。俞梅就這樣遇到了友誼挫折。 當(dāng)俞梅感覺到這種情況的時(shí)候，她非常傷心。她向媽媽哭訴自己遇到的情況，誰知，媽媽并不理解俞梅的想法，反而呵斥道：“這么一點(diǎn)小事值得大驚小怪嗎？真是沒用的人！” 媽媽的呵斥讓俞梅更加傷心。從此，她變得郁郁寡歡，不管遇到什么事情也不對(duì)媽媽說了。等媽媽意識(shí)到俞梅的變化時(shí)，俞梅已經(jīng)變得非常悲觀了。

可見，對(duì)于孩子表現(xiàn)出的悲傷或軟弱，父母不要呵斥，應(yīng)該讓孩子盡情地發(fā)泄心中的郁悶，只要孩子發(fā)泄夠了，他自然會(huì)恢復(fù)心情的平衡。當(dāng)然，如果孩子需要父母的幫助，父母應(yīng)該及時(shí)安慰孩子，用相同的心理去感受孩子的情緒，努力引起孩子的情感共鳴，從而緩解孩子的不良情緒。

建議五：對(duì)孩子進(jìn)行希望教育。

樂觀的孩子往往對(duì)未來充滿了希望，悲觀的孩子則往往覺得沒有希望。因此，父母要對(duì)孩子進(jìn)行希望教育。希望教育是一項(xiàng)細(xì)致的工程，需要父母及時(shí)地感受到孩子的沮喪和憂愁，幫助孩子驅(qū)散心中的陰影。

一位外國(guó)大提琴家的童年故事可以說就是一個(gè)絕好的例證。

有一天，他拖著比自己身體還高的大提琴，在走廊里邁著輕快的步伐，心情顯然好極了。一位長(zhǎng)者問到：“孩子，你這么高興，是不是剛拉完大提琴 ? ” 他的腳步并沒有停下，“不，我正要去拉。” 這個(gè)7歲的孩子懂得一個(gè)許多大人不懂的道理：音樂是一種愉快的享受，而不是我們不得不做的、必須忍受的工作。

平時(shí)，父母要多引導(dǎo)孩子看到自己的進(jìn)步和成績(jī)，鼓勵(lì)孩子想像自己的美好未來，讓孩子對(duì)自己的未來充滿希望。只要孩子對(duì)未來充滿了希望，孩子必定會(huì)以樂觀的心態(tài)去面對(duì)生活中的事情。

建議六：豐富孩子的精神生活。

豐富孩子的精神生活可以使孩子把注意力轉(zhuǎn)移到其他事情上來。

一方面，父母要鼓勵(lì)孩子廣泛地閱讀，讓孩子在閱讀中增加知識(shí)，升華思想。可以選擇閱讀偉人的故事、童話、小說等文學(xué)作品。

另一方面，父母要鼓勵(lì)孩子多交朋友，為孩子創(chuàng)造與同齡人交往的機(jī)會(huì)，如帶孩子到鄰居家串門，邀請(qǐng)其他孩子到家里來玩，讓孩子多到同學(xué)家去玩等。另外，父母可多搞一些活動(dòng)，如帶孩子外出游玩；也可讓孩子做一些創(chuàng)造性的活動(dòng)，如利用廢物制作小作品，通過豐富孩子的精神生活，讓孩子在各種活動(dòng)中體會(huì)到生活的樂趣，增強(qiáng)對(duì)生活的信心，培養(yǎng)孩子樂觀的性格。

讓孩子積極參加各種活動(dòng)。開始時(shí)，可以暗示孩子主動(dòng)提問，主動(dòng)要求、主動(dòng)學(xué)習(xí)。緊接著，當(dāng)孩子主動(dòng)行動(dòng)了，父母要用表?yè)P(yáng)、獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)等方法強(qiáng)化孩子的自主觀念。

孩子主動(dòng)去做了，不一定成功。父母要激勵(lì)孩子，告訴孩子：“人生不如意事十有八九”。失敗了一次不要緊，失敗是成功之母。讓孩子接觸各類事物，接觸的事情多了，見多識(shí)廣，心胸自然就開闊，悲觀思想便不容易產(chǎn)生了。

第5種習(xí)慣 理財(cái)

我只是這筆財(cái)富的看管人，我需要找到最合適的方式來使用它。——比爾·蓋茨

一切時(shí)髦的東西總會(huì)變成不時(shí)髦的，如果你一輩子追求時(shí)髦，一直追求到老，你就會(huì)成為一個(gè)受任何人輕視的花花公子。——舒曼

《富爸爸，窮爸爸》的作者羅伯特·清崎在自己的著作中寫道

“今天我們的教育體制已不能跟上全球變革和技術(shù)創(chuàng)新的步伐。我們不僅要教育年輕人在學(xué)術(shù)上的技能，也要教育他們理財(cái)?shù)募寄?。這不僅是他們?cè)谶@個(gè)世界上生存下去，而且是生活得更美好所必須具備的技能。”

“之所以世界上絕大多數(shù)的人為了財(cái)富奮斗終生而不可得，其主要原因在于雖然他們都曾在各種學(xué)校中學(xué)習(xí)多年，卻從未真正學(xué)習(xí)到關(guān)于金錢的知識(shí)；其結(jié)果就是他們只知道為了錢而拼命工作，卻從不去思索如何讓錢為他們工作。”

羅伯特·清崎清楚地告訴我們：理財(cái)對(duì)于一個(gè)人來說是一種非常重要的社會(huì)生存技能，一個(gè)人必須端正對(duì)金錢的態(tài)度，不能成為金錢的奴隸，而是要讓金錢為我們服務(wù)。

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