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資深幼兒園園長：剛上幼兒園不哭的孩子，多半具備三個(gè)特征

出處：@禾禾媽愛學(xué)習(xí)日期：2024-08-20 03:02:16編輯：網(wǎng)絡(luò)收集

同事的兒子是夫妻倆辛苦備孕6年才要上的，所以，一家上下都對他極其疼愛。

去年孩子滿3歲的時(shí)候，同事也像多數(shù)家長一樣，給兒子在幼兒園報(bào)了名，但送了不到一周的時(shí)間，就辦理了退園。

問其原因，她說，每天送兒子去幼兒園太煎熬了，哭的那叫一個(gè)撕心裂肺、死去活來，自己實(shí)在不忍心就辦理了退園，反正家里有公婆看著，明年再去吧。

轉(zhuǎn)眼間，一年時(shí)間匆匆而過，距離孩子再次入園只有不到兩個(gè)月的時(shí)間了，同事又一次焦慮了起來，擔(dān)心兒子又像去年一樣無法適應(yīng)幼兒園生活。

為此，她還請教了不少有經(jīng)驗(yàn)的家長以及幼兒園的園長和老教師，希望能找到有效的解決辦法。

一位有著多年教學(xué)經(jīng)驗(yàn)的老園長說，通過自己的觀察，剛上幼兒園不哭的孩子，普遍有以下三個(gè)特征。

01 提前熟悉過幼兒園環(huán)境的孩子

提及剛上幼兒園不哭的孩子，老園長說，自己印象最深的便是一個(gè)叫果果的男孩，從第一天上幼兒園，一直到幼兒園畢業(yè)，一天也沒有因?yàn)椴幌肴ビ變簣@哭過。

因?yàn)檫@種孩子極為少見，老園長當(dāng)時(shí)也十分好奇，所以，就跟孩子的媽媽聊了聊。

孩子?jì)寢尡硎?，自家就在幼兒園門口小區(qū)，兒子3歲前路過時(shí)，總能透過幼兒園圍欄看到里面各種好玩的滑梯、沙坑、秋千等各種游戲設(shè)備。

每次路過孩子都抓著圍欄哭著喊著要進(jìn)去玩，后來終于能進(jìn)去上幼兒園了，果然開心的不行，第一次送去的時(shí)候，都沒回頭看媽媽一眼。

心理學(xué)家馬斯洛的“需要層次理論”告訴我們，生理需要和安全需要是人類最基本的需要。

孩子剛?cè)雸@，突然與親人分離，面對陌生的環(huán)境、老師和小朋友，很難不產(chǎn)生極大的不安全感，從而大哭大鬧，排斥去這個(gè)看似充滿危險(xiǎn)的陌生環(huán)境。

所以，作為家長，我們?nèi)粝刖徑夂⒆拥娜雸@焦慮，最好是利用閑余時(shí)間，多帶孩子提前了解下所上幼兒園的環(huán)境，告訴他幼兒園生活的有趣之處，讓他從地理空間和心理上，逐漸做好入園的準(zhǔn)備。

02 父母給足“安全感”的孩子

所謂安全感，就是一種讓孩子內(nèi)心感到踏實(shí)、舒適和信任的情感狀態(tài)。

簡單來說，就是當(dāng)孩子相信自己處于安全、無威脅的環(huán)境中，并且有人或者事物可以依賴和信任時(shí)，他就有安全感。

具體到剛?cè)雸@的孩子來說，就是當(dāng)他被送去幼兒園的時(shí)候，依舊能感受到父母的關(guān)愛保護(hù)，以及有一個(gè)安全的家，父母會(huì)準(zhǔn)時(shí)接他回去，便可自信勇敢的適應(yīng)幼兒園生活 。

老園長說，據(jù)自己觀察，那些入園不哭，或者哭上一兩天就再也不哭的孩子，性格上都有幾個(gè)共同點(diǎn)，那就是——性格開朗活潑，善于分享自己的物品和快樂，懂得關(guān)心和幫助他人，能夠與小伙伴們建立良好的友誼。

而以上特征，便是孩子充滿“安全感”的表現(xiàn)。

孩子安全感的獲得是一個(gè)多方面的過程，涉及到家庭環(huán)境、親子關(guān)系、教育方式等多個(gè)方面。

為孩子創(chuàng)造一個(gè)和諧、穩(wěn)定的家庭環(huán)境；避免在孩子面前爭吵或冷戰(zhàn)；答應(yīng)孩子的事一定要做到；鼓勵(lì)孩子與同齡人交往，培養(yǎng)他們的社交能力，在孩子遇到困難時(shí)，提供適當(dāng)?shù)膸椭椭С值确绞剑伎梢蕴岣吆⒆拥陌踩小?/p>

03 自理能力、社交能力超強(qiáng)的孩子

鄰居家的小女兒，不到3歲的時(shí)候，就嚷嚷著要去幼兒園，鄰居家也沒老人幫忙，老大又恰好中考，所以，就送去了。

本以為孩子也就是圖新鮮，可能過不了幾天就不想去了，沒想到，女兒在幼兒園呆了沒一個(gè)星期就混成“孩子頭”了。

據(jù)幼兒園老師說，她女兒不僅話多，人緣好，關(guān)鍵是還特別喜歡幫助其他小朋友，有好幾次看老師給其他小朋友喂飯，她還自告奮勇去教小朋友如何自己拿勺子吃飯。

有一次鄰居問她“家里好還是幼兒園好？”

沒想到小姑娘竟然說：“幼兒園比家里好玩多了，家里只有媽媽一個(gè)人，幼兒園有好多小朋友，還可以跟小朋友一起吃飯、玩游戲、上廁所……”

這類孩子，明顯的就是“社牛”+“獨(dú)立自理能力超強(qiáng)”的綜合體。

對于他們而言，從家到幼兒園，不存在其他孩子所謂的吃飯、穿衣、上廁所等困難，還具有家里沒有的獨(dú)特優(yōu)勢——更多的小朋友，游樂設(shè)備，多人游戲……

他們不愿去幼兒園，在幼兒園會(huì)哭才怪呢！

同事家的孩子，打小被同事一家嬌慣著長大，四歲了還不會(huì)獨(dú)立吃飯、穿衣、上廁所，社交能力也很一般，所以，這一點(diǎn)上她還要好好努力。

【寫在最后】

孩子自從出生到上幼兒園，其主要生活場所就是溫馨的家，主要照顧人就是爸爸媽媽或者爺爺奶奶。

3年的時(shí)間，孩子早已習(xí)慣了這種生活模式，所以，忽然間從熟悉的家去到陌生的幼兒園，關(guān)鍵還沒有親人陪伴。

年幼的孩子，沒有十足的安全感，超強(qiáng)的自理和社交能力，孩子很難不感到不適應(yīng)，甚至焦慮、抗拒。

所以，作為家長，孩子若出現(xiàn)“幼兒園分離焦慮”癥狀，也未必過于擔(dān)心，因?yàn)檫@種情況一般持續(xù)2周左右就會(huì)消失。

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